After my previous blog I got two questions about some of the content.
was, what those hurdles were that I was talking about. Next people wondered whether
I truly meant it when I wrote: ‘Winning or losing, I’m very happy I
participated!’ Wasn’t this just a way to hide the fear/ chance of upcoming
start with the hurdles, I think explaining those will also answer the second
I mentioned before, as a child I dreamed of illustrating books but I never made
any serious attempts to pursue this dream. Now I was finally doing it! Exiting
of illustrating I went to the Academy of Fine Art in Education. Still I can
hear the teacher’s voices echoing in my head: my taste in art was poor, not to
mention cliché and so was my artwork. Even now tiny parts of my brain objected
to me illustrating: ‘this wasn’t art with a capital A!!’ I decided not to care,
I was enjoying myself and that’s what matters, right?!
on my art I got stuck often. I got scared to continue, scared to ruin things,
scared of expectations. This made me re-think everything. Illustrating for the
contest there was no time for such nonsense. All 3 illustrations needed to be
finished well before the 1st of May.
So I had to just ‘do’.
rediscovered how much I like storytelling, my way. Now when I draw I just ‘do’
and don’t get stuck that easily. I got closer to what I like doing without
being embarrassed about it. I found new solutions, new materials, new
the 20 days of working on my illustrations I had a week of vacation and I
caught myself thinking: ‘Oh, I hope I won’t spend my whole vacation drawing!’
And then I thought, wait a minute, I remember a time when I couldn’t wait for
the (school-) vacation to start so I could draw all week! The
moment I realized that, something changed, I couldn’t wait to get to my studio
and start drawing.
Doing these 3 illustrations has brought me so much. So when I say that even when I'm losing I'm winning, I truly mean it.
Below an unfinished detail of the 2nd illustration I did for the Lemniscaat contest.