Unlocking doors

A few months ago I felt like drawing my mom, she died two years ago and I wanted to do a little portrait of her. When it was finished I put it on Facebook and got some really nice comments. My friend Sanneke Griepink, who is an artist too, replied: ‘Hey you can do portraits too!’ And somehow that little remark made me think. Yes, I can do portraits too, in fact it was my favourite thing to do as a teenager, draw my family, actors, popstars… When did I quit again? Oh right, right after I finished art academy.

Somehow doing portraits became a bad thing.

In the years after that I did one portrait I really liked doing and then right after one I really hated and never finished. I ended up passing on the commission to a befriended artist and never doing a portrait again.

As it turns out I don’t hate doing portraits, I just need to stay close to a way of working that fits me. Right now I’m working on a portrait of my brother and very much enjoying the process. It’s not quite ready yet but still having fun and already looking forward to the next portraitproject.

Another door I’m pondering to unlock is teaching, giving small courses from my home…

Dear Diary (4)

Starting this blog I intended to share all my highs & lows that I would encounter in my art adventures but as it turned out I didn’t. For the last 7 months it has been nothing but tumbleweed here.

For me art or the act of making is very personal. When I don’t function properly, the making doesn’t work properly. For some mysterious reason I didn’t have the energy to do anything. As it turned out I was having a burn-out. The making had slowed down and for a short period it even stopped. After the diagnose I continued working at my paid job but 2 months later I also needed to press pause on that front and I ended up losing that job. 
 

I’m doing better now but a lot has changed. No job (yet) and I had to give up my shared studio at Retort.

Having a burn-out, losing my job and studio have inspired me to really take a good look at myself and made me think and realise what I really want. What I want is to continue being an artist, make money with my art and art related activities!

This April I rearranged my home so I can use that as my studio and maybe even as a space to teach. Who needs a proper livingroom when most of your living consists of drawing?!
See you next week!


Something I'm working on (sorry, not a great pic)

Back in the blogging game!!

After a hiatus of almost 7 months I’m back in the blogging game!
Long story but I want to start out on a positive note. Last year I participated in the Lemniscaat illustration contest and I’m planning to do so again this year so here is a detailed sketch of one of the images I’m working on :)

Love Derwent Pencils!!

Really didn’t want to do any of the chores I planned for today. So I went out to give myself a treat! I went to Van Beek Art Supplies and bought myself some new Derwent pencils, which I love since Karisma was taken out of the shops in the Netherlands. I already have some Derwent Coloursoft to replace the Karisma ones and later I bought some Derwent Inktence. But now I thought I was in need of some pastel pencils and next to that I found the Derwent Graphitint of which I bought five.
To finish everything nicely I bought a nice pencil wrap to put them in and I'm ready to go :)

Into the Woods

Estate Heidestein, Bornia, Driebergen-Rijsenburg, The Netherlands

Books I'm Reading (4)

‘Another book?!’ my boyfriend exclaimed when I stopped by at the ABC, the bookstore where he works, and I bought Art Inc. - The Essential Guide for Building Your Career as an Artist by Lisa Congdon. ‘You should be drawing instead of reading!’
And he’s right, I should be drawing more than I am now but this book was a really good read!

Lisa Congdon is known for her art, illustrations and hand lettering. She exhibits. She has multiple big clients, a popular blog called Today is Going to be Awesome and written 3 books including this one. So I thought she might have something useful to say about the matter.

Congdon covers lots of things artists may struggle with. The first chapter is called You Are an Artist, where she tells you to embrace being an artist. Then follow things like building your vision and goals, branding your business, organizing time, all the different ways to promote your work, making digital prints, how and where to sell your art,  having exhibitions, how to deal with galleries etc. All this is illustrated by her own experience and 14 interviews with people who are working in the art business, either as artists or differently.
What it comes down to, making it in this business, is really hard work and investing lots of time and energy and not to forget the occasional money.
Some issues like law-related things you should check with the country you live in but apart from that I think that if you’re not quite where you want to be as an artist this book could be of great help.
Read this book!


Art Inc. The Essential Guide for Building Your Career as an Artist - Lisa Congdon - Chronicle Books

New work

The beginning of a new brainchild. About the beauty of the night, colours and sounds, rustling treetops and flying critters.

Rorschach for Doodlers

About a month ago I stumbled upon the article ‘Rorschach Test for Doodlers’ on the website ‘Doodlers Anonymous’. The idea is simple, just spatter some ink or paint between your sketchbook pages, close it, rub it a bit and open to admire the spatter result. Most of the time your mind will turn these spots into bats, butterflies etc. The challenge is take it a step further.
So I tried and I liked doing these pages so much that for the last couple of weeks I start all my drawing days like this! Not having any control on what will happen on the pages suits me perfectly.

Here's one I did recently:

 

 

Books I'm reading (3)

A few months ago I bought Creative Block by Danielle Krysa a.k.a. The Jealous Curator and I’m very glad I did! First I had my doubts. Again and again I would go to the American Book Center, stare at the book and wonder: ’Was this just another self-help book or…’ I was flipping through the book once more when my eye caught a sentence that made the buy a sure thing:

‘Do you ever equate your self-worth with your artistic successes?’

Guilty! My self-worth has been entwined with my art since a very early age. Not a smart thing to do but hey, what do you do?

Danielle Krysa interviewed 50 successful artists and asked them about the way they work, why they make art, where they find inspiration but also:

- Which artist’s work / life/ career are you most jealous of and why?

- Does your inner critic ever get to you?

- What do you do when you’re feeling blocked?

Every interview consists of more or less the same questions with very different answers. At times recognisable and at times not at all. Funny and good to know there are so many ways to look at this art-thing. All 50 interviews end with a creative unblock project by the interviewee.

 

Another word that stuck was ‘process’. Different artists would say process is what drives them to continue making art, not the end-product or the success. This made me re-think my own process and I concluded that I skip some very important steps.
This book is a fun read, good questions, funny and helpful answers. Next to that it’s filled with really beautiful pictures of the artists artwork. Buy this book!

 

Please don’t forget to check www.thejealouscurator.com and learn why Danielle Krysa calls herself that.


Creative Block by Danielle Krysa. Chronicle Books. Pentel Aquash Water Brush with Talens ecoline.

Dear diary (3)

Okay, I haven’t been doing things like I promised or set out to do. For one I haven’t written in 2,5 months and I planned to write at least once a week!
What upsets me most is that I wasn’t able to continue writing when things (artwise) sort of fell apart.
I meant to share these things on my blog but when things got rough I couldn’t.
The last few months I had some really important insights but alas, they didn’t come with a handy how to-guide. Two words that had great impact were ‘process’ and ‘ego’.
My process is, or hopefully was, almost non-existing, probably the reason why I lose interest and fun in a subject so quickly. It’s been a rough period and I hope that’s finished now.
Upcoming weeks I will let you know more about my findings from the past months and my start of a new chapter in art.

Getting a grip on things

A few weeks ago Lemniscaat pronounced the winners of the illustration contest and I wasn’t among them. I anticipated this so no worries. I’m happy I found out so much about myself during the (creative) process.
The whole experience left me with one more very practical surprise. Even after working such long hours at the time I was still able to draw. My hand did not hurt like it would have in the past!
In 2008 I injured my hand (mostly my thumb) after a rush job and I neglected to give my hand a good rest. For about a year I couldn’t do anything. Writing, drawing, even holding a book during reading was a challenge.
Over time things got better but I still couldn’t work long hours, I had to stop all printing activities and I switched from pencil and pastels to drawing inks.
While I was working on the illustrations my hand would hurt after a long day in the studio but then I would give my hand a rest for a day and it was fine again!

So now new ideas are bubbling up in my head, I will be able to mix inks with pastels, pick up my pencils again! Yay! I worked with this mix before but at the time it was too soon and sure I have to be careful not to overdo it again but this prospect makes me very happy.

Last week I went to Van Beek, my local art supply shop and I found a pencil extender by Derwent. I’m not going to use it to extend my pencils but to broaden my pencils. A broad grip lessens the chance of injury because it is more relaxed to hold.
Thursday is studio-day, I can’t wait!

Derwent 8mm Pencil Extender (grip is 12mm)

About taking hurdles

After my previous blog I got two questions about some of the content.
First was, what those hurdles were that I was talking about. Next people wondered whether I truly meant it when I wrote: ‘Winning or losing, I’m very happy I participated!’ Wasn’t this just a way to hide the fear/ chance of upcoming disappointment?
I’ll start with the hurdles, I think explaining those will also answer the second question.
Like I mentioned before, as a child I dreamed of illustrating books but I never made any serious attempts to pursue this dream. Now I was finally doing it! Exiting but scary.
Instead of illustrating I went to the Academy of Fine Art in Education. Still I can hear the teacher’s voices echoing in my head: my taste in art was poor, not to mention cliché and so was my artwork. Even now tiny parts of my brain objected to me illustrating: ‘this wasn’t art with a capital A!!’ I decided not to care, I was enjoying myself and that’s what matters, right?!
Working on my art I got stuck often. I got scared to continue, scared to ruin things, scared of expectations. This made me re-think everything. Illustrating for the contest there was no time for such nonsense. All 3 illustrations needed to be finished well before the 1^st of May.
So I had to just ‘do’.
I rediscovered how much I like storytelling, my way. Now when I draw I just ‘do’ and don’t get stuck that easily. I got closer to what I like doing without being embarrassed about it. I found new solutions, new materials, new combinations.
During the 20 days of working on my illustrations I had a week of vacation and I caught myself thinking: ‘Oh, I hope I won’t spend my whole vacation drawing!’ And then I thought, wait a minute, I remember a time when I couldn’t wait for the (school-) vacation to start so I could draw all week! The moment I realized that, something changed, I couldn’t wait to get to my studio and start drawing.
Doing these 3 illustrations has brought me so much. So when I say that even when I'm losing I'm winning, I truly mean it.

Below an unfinished detail of the 2nd illustration I did for the Lemniscaat contest.

Lemniscaat illustration contest

Again I’ve been too quiet for my own (blogging-) good. Last month I was totally occupied by the Lemniscaat illustration contest. Literally every moment I could spend drawing, I did.
As a child I always dreamed of illustrating children’s- and mostly fairytale books but I never actually made any attempts to do so.
Illustrators were asked by publisher Lemniscaat to send in three illustrations that go with a story of their own choice. It was clear to me it had to be a fairytale but which one?
I chose a story from ‘Persian Fairytales’ by Arthur Christensen (original title: Persische Märchen). My dad used to read from them when I was little and after all the stories by Grimm and Andersen they were amazingly refreshing. These stories had all this different creatures and different magic and lots of blood and gore! My choice fell upon ‘Mohammed the shepherd and the three Peri princesses’.
From beginning to end it took me almost 20 days to finish all three illustrations and I was just in time for the (Dutch) closing date on May 1^st! It took me this long because I had to take some really hard hurdles that housed in my brain. Now that I have returned to my ‘regular’ drawings I can feel a difference in the way I work. I just DO because when working on the illustrations there was no time to ponder every brushstroke, they had to be finished and soon! So I’m very happy with this change and much happier to go to my studio.
Sure I would like to win the contest, sure I would like to be among the 10 best and attend a master class by an internationally recognized illustrator. I would like having my work promoted during the Bologna Children’s Book Fair. Have my work exhibited in library ‘The Hive’, in Worcester, England, in the Shanghai Library, China and also in the Centrale Bibliotheek Rotterdam, The Netherlands.
I would like all these things very much but taking these personal hurdles was very important to me. Winning or losing I’m very happy I participated!

Below details from the three illustrations I did for the Lemniscaat contest.